Tag: Couples Humor

The Kiss

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, “It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her.”

Adam answered, “Yes Lord, but what is a kiss?”

So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush. A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, “Thank you Lord, that Was enjoyable.”

And the Lord replied, “Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I’d like you to caress Eve.”

And Adam said, “What is a caress’?

So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.

Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, “Lord, that was even better than the kiss.”

And the Lord said, “You’ve done well, Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve.”

And Adam asked, “What is ‘make love’ Lord?”‘

So the Lord again gave Adam directions and Adam went again to Eve behind the bush, but this time he reappeared in two seconds.

And Adam said, “Lord, what is a headache?”

Hat tip: Paul of Mr. Cruiser’s Notes

Image Credit: STR Place Blog

Senior Love

I was in my back yard trying to launch a kite. I threw the kite up in the air, the wind would catch it for a few seconds, then it would come crashing back down to earth. I tried this a few more times with no success.

All the while, my wife is watching from the kitchen window, muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything.

She opens the window and yelled to me, ‘You need a piece of tail.’

I turned with a confused look on my face and said, ‘Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite.’

Image Credit: Brookite

Finding a Woman

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”

Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”

His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a blonde who’s just like your mother.”

A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect blonde? Did your mother like her?”

With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect blonde. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”

The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”

Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”

Image Credit: Kresta In The Afternoon