Realizations

I talk to myself because sometimes I need expert advice.

Sometimes I roll my eyes out loud.

I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.

My people skills are just fine. It’s my tolerance of idiots that needs work.

The biggest lie I tell myself is, “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”

When I was a child I thought nap time was punishment. Now it’s like a mini-vacation.

The day the world runs out of wine is just too terrible to think about.

Even duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it can muffle the sound.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves through the dryer for ten minutes, and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller?

“Getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering why I’m there.

Image Credit: Private Pinko

48 thoughts on “Realizations

  1. Ann says:

    oh now you know I love these. Every one of them belongs on one of my index cards and I saved a copy of this so if I ever get back to making them I can use these πŸ™‚

  2. Jim says:

    When we were in China a fellow touristor's mother was there with her and hubby. When the mother talked with us she took notes about us and our conversation. I'm not sure how or if she used them. She did get lost in a city market for several hours once. Our bus waited for her to be found.
    I'm glad you could still remember making prank Prince Albert calls.
    ..

  3. Nancy Chan says:

    I talk to myself when I am thinking aloud. I do roll my eyes at times. I gave up writing on pieces of paper because it doesn't help me but now I have smart phone reminder which works for me. Naps? I am beginning to enjoy naps when I couldn't keep my eyes open at anytime of the day!

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