Modern Barbie Dolls

Green Earth Barbie – This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks , or combat boots with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Green Earth Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

Dropout Barbie – This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Trailer Trash Barbie – This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gut Ken out of Trailer Trash Barbie’s house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a skimpy halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
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