Life

On the first day, God created the dog and said, “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.”

The dog said, “That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I’ll give you back the other ten?”

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, “Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I’ll give you a twenty-year life span.”

The monkey said, “Monkey tricks for twenty years? That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?”

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, “You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.”

The cow said, “That’s kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I’ll give back the other forty?”

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, “Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I’ll give you twenty years.”

But the human said, “Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?”

“Okay,” said God, “You asked for it.”

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

Hat tip: Linda W.
Image Credit: Image Chef

  48 comments for “Life

  1. June 30, 2015 at 5:13 am

    I like that one. It sure explains life in no uncertain terms. Sandee, you and Zane and Little Bit all have a great day.

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:55 pm

      It sure does Marg, and it explains it very well too. πŸ™‚

  2. June 30, 2015 at 5:21 am

    Holy moly, that splains life so well! I will be on the porch…

    Big hugs, honey…

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:55 pm

      I'll come and join you honey. We might as well bark together. With some wine of course. πŸ™‚

  3. June 30, 2015 at 5:21 am

    Somehow that is the best explanation of life I have heard. Brilliant.

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:56 pm

      It sure is Rhonda. Pretty accurate too. πŸ™‚

  4. June 30, 2015 at 6:12 am

    Now I understand why I entertain my grandchildren. Ha,ha,ha. Have a wonderful Tuesday Sandee. See ya.

    Cruisin Paul

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:56 pm

      Yep, we are fun to watch aren't we. πŸ™‚

  5. June 30, 2015 at 7:29 am

    This is gold.

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:56 pm

      I thought so too Joe. πŸ™‚

  6. June 30, 2015 at 7:45 am

    Ha, who knew there was reasoning behind our common habits. πŸ™‚

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:56 pm

      Well, we know now. πŸ™‚

  7. June 30, 2015 at 7:50 am

    Right now, I think I'm in the stage of using up the housefly's time. I'm flying around and annoying everyone.

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:57 pm

      Well, I'm on the porch barking at everyone. We're both doing good work. πŸ™‚

  8. June 30, 2015 at 8:13 am

    Another good one, Sandee.

  9. June 30, 2015 at 8:17 am

    Brilliantly explanation of life heheh!

    Have a lifetastic day Sandee πŸ™‚

    • June 30, 2015 at 1:57 pm

      Thanks Steve and you have a lifetastic day too. πŸ™‚

  10. June 30, 2015 at 8:57 am

    Heeheehee! Excellent explanation!

  11. June 30, 2015 at 9:15 am

    Ha! I did not predict that ending.

    • June 30, 2015 at 2:04 pm

      I didn't either, but it was spot on. πŸ™‚

  12. June 30, 2015 at 10:58 am

    BWHaaaaaaa….another good one.
    I have heard this one before, but I like it :))

    • June 30, 2015 at 2:04 pm

      You're too young for the porch, but that's where I'll be if you need me. πŸ™‚

  13. June 30, 2015 at 11:16 am

    oh this is definitely a keeper! Big big hugs!

    • June 30, 2015 at 2:04 pm

      It sure is Kathe. πŸ™‚

  14. June 30, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Haha! That was fun!

    Hope you're having a great week Sandee! Scritches to Little Bit!

    • June 30, 2015 at 2:05 pm

      We're in a horrible heatwave so we're staying indoors as much as possible. πŸ™‚

  15. June 30, 2015 at 1:47 pm

    I don't have grandchildren to do monkey tricks for, I hope that doesn't mean I lose those ten years πŸ™‚

    • June 30, 2015 at 2:05 pm

      Nope, you'll keep your ten years, but you might have to do more porch time. That's better than working. πŸ™‚

    • June 30, 2015 at 3:30 pm

      I am at the growl stage, but I do feel a bark coming on.
      My videos for day 3 disappeared for some reason. I had to put them back.

    • July 1, 2015 at 12:45 am

      Oh, good to know as I don't have grand kids either. I love porch time! :)) xoxo

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:28 am

      You're younger than I am Driller. You'll get to the barking soon enough. πŸ™‚

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:29 am

      Porch time rocks Barb, especially if there is a glass of wine involved. πŸ™‚

  16. June 30, 2015 at 2:58 pm

    Finally. The meaning of life.

  17. June 30, 2015 at 6:34 pm

    Ha ha that is actually an AWWWWWWWW post! That is so bittersweet! I told my kids if I end up as "one of THOSE" old people to take me in the back yard and shoot me. They promised!

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:33 am

      Oh I know what you're talking about. I know some of them and I avoid them. πŸ™‚

  18. June 30, 2015 at 6:51 pm

    OMG that was one of the most hilarious posts I have read in some time! This is a classic! xoxo

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:33 am

      It's a classic indeed. The circle of life. πŸ™‚

  19. June 30, 2015 at 7:27 pm

    That is alarmingly true!

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:34 am

      It is indeed Stephanie. πŸ™‚

  20. June 30, 2015 at 7:49 pm

    This is a really good one, Sandee! Thank you so much for sharing. πŸ™‚

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:34 am

      You're most welcome. My friend Linda sent it to me. πŸ™‚

  21. June 30, 2015 at 10:21 pm

    What a nice analysis of human life!

    • July 1, 2015 at 9:34 am

      It's spot on too. πŸ™‚

  22. July 1, 2015 at 3:36 pm

    Explains a lot!

    • July 1, 2015 at 4:33 pm

      The circle of life. πŸ™‚

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