Confessional

A priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting to leave the confessional unattended, he called his rabbi friend from across the street and asked him to cover for him.

The rabbi told him he wouldn’t know what to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he’d stay with him for a little bit and show him what to do.The rabbi comes, and he and the priest are in the confessional. In a few minutes, a woman comes in and says, ‘Father, forgive me for I have sinned.’

The priest asks, ‘What did you do?’
The woman says, ‘I committed adultery.’
The priest says, ‘How many times?’
And the woman replies, ‘Three.’
Priest: ‘Say two Hail Mary’s, put $5 in the box, and go and sin no more.’
A few minutes later a man enters the confessional. He says, ‘Father forgive me for I have sinned.’
‘What did you do?’
‘I committed adultery.’
‘How many times?’
‘Three times.’
The priest says, ‘Say two Hail Mary’s, put $5 in the box and go and sin no more.’
The rabbi tells the priest that he thinks he’s got it, so the priest leaves.
A few minutes later another woman enters and says, ‘Father, forgive me for I have sinned.’
The rabbi says, ‘What did you do?’
The woman replies, ‘I committed adultery.’
The rabbi, getting it off pat, says, ‘How many times?’
The woman replies, ‘Once.’
The rabbi said, ‘Go and do it two more times, We have a special this week, three for $5.’

Hat tip: Paul of Mr. Cruiser’s Notes
Image Credit: Pop Dose

  52 comments for “Confessional

  1. June 23, 2015 12:58 am at 12:58 am

    bahahahaha! :))

    Have yourself an unorthodox day, Sandee! xoxo

    • June 23, 2015 10:30 am at 10:30 am

      You too Barb. 🙂

  2. June 23, 2015 2:22 am at 2:22 am

    Hahahahahahaha! I don't think he got it at all. 😛

    • June 23, 2015 10:30 am at 10:30 am

      I think he did it his way. 🙂

  3. Ann
    June 23, 2015 2:30 am at 2:30 am

    and that's what happens when you don't get adequate training…..lol

    • June 23, 2015 10:30 am at 10:30 am

      Well, there is that. 🙂

  4. June 23, 2015 3:52 am at 3:52 am

    Too very funny. He is going to get that $5.00. Sandee, you have a great day along with Zane and Little Bit.

    • June 23, 2015 10:31 am at 10:31 am

      Yep, he going to get that five bucks indeed. 🙂

  5. June 23, 2015 4:25 am at 4:25 am

    Oh my, he is too straight forward! And what a mess it will be! Lol!

    • June 23, 2015 10:31 am at 10:31 am

      Yes, it will be a mess, but perhaps fun for the woman. 🙂

  6. June 23, 2015 4:58 am at 4:58 am

    Lol…

  7. June 23, 2015 5:42 am at 5:42 am

    Hey! That was my ex-wife!

    • June 23, 2015 10:32 am at 10:32 am

      Hey! That was my ex-husband! 🙂

  8. June 23, 2015 5:43 am at 5:43 am

    this is hysterical! Thanks for the giggles and give LB some extra hugs from Lucy! She loves dogs!

    • June 23, 2015 10:32 am at 10:32 am

      I'll be glad to give LB some extra hugs from Auntie Kathe. 🙂

  9. June 23, 2015 5:50 am at 5:50 am

    Boy oh boy would I not like to have to fill in on a Confessional booth, but I think the Rabbi has got it down indeed!

    Have a great day and thanks for the laughs!

    • June 23, 2015 10:33 am at 10:33 am

      He's doing it his way isn't he. 🙂

  10. June 23, 2015 5:53 am at 5:53 am

    Such a deal! Hahaha.

    Big hugs to you, and scritches to LB, honey…

    • June 23, 2015 10:33 am at 10:33 am

      For her it is. 🙂

  11. June 23, 2015 5:56 am at 5:56 am

    Oh my! LOL

    • June 23, 2015 10:33 am at 10:33 am

      All's fair with this Rabbi. 🙂

  12. June 23, 2015 6:09 am at 6:09 am

    So Funny. Thanks for the giggles.

    • June 23, 2015 10:33 am at 10:33 am

      You're most welcome Rhonda. 🙂

  13. June 23, 2015 6:46 am at 6:46 am

    Hahahahahahaaaaaa…super deals in confessional!
    Have a great day!

    • June 23, 2015 10:33 am at 10:33 am

      Super deal for her indeed. 🙂

  14. June 23, 2015 7:36 am at 7:36 am

    Never buy retail.

    • June 23, 2015 10:34 am at 10:34 am

      Bwahahahahahaha. This is spot on. 🙂

  15. June 23, 2015 8:28 am at 8:28 am

    I wonder if the male is the same one with the woman.

    I read Kismet's comment and had to laugh as I pondered it.

    xoxo

    • June 23, 2015 10:34 am at 10:34 am

      Kismet has a wicked sense of humor. 🙂

  16. June 23, 2015 9:04 am at 9:04 am

    Such a deal 😉

    • June 23, 2015 10:34 am at 10:34 am

      Everyone wins. 🙂

  17. June 23, 2015 9:29 am at 9:29 am

    Hahahahaha! That made me laugh! MOL!

    Hope you're having a great Tortie Tuesday! Scritches to Little Bit!

    • June 23, 2015 10:35 am at 10:35 am

      I'm having a great Tortie Tuesday. 🙂

  18. June 23, 2015 11:00 am at 11:00 am

    The Rabbi got it right! Have a nice day Sandee!

    • June 23, 2015 2:17 pm at 2:17 pm

      Well, he did didn't he. Did what the priest did. 🙂

  19. June 23, 2015 11:29 am at 11:29 am

    Haha. That seems about right!

    • June 23, 2015 2:17 pm at 2:17 pm

      Made sense to the Rabbi. 🙂

  20. June 23, 2015 11:56 am at 11:56 am

    :)) =)) :-f :-* :-h

    • June 23, 2015 2:18 pm at 2:18 pm

      I agree Mike. 🙂

  21. June 23, 2015 1:18 pm at 1:18 pm

    LMAO well he was only trying to help :))

    Have an offertastic day Sandee :-h

    • June 23, 2015 2:18 pm at 2:18 pm

      Yes, and he thought it was three for five. 🙂

  22. June 23, 2015 3:03 pm at 3:03 pm

    LOL! Love this! So very funny!

    • June 23, 2015 4:51 pm at 4:51 pm

      Thanks so much Cherie. 🙂

  23. June 23, 2015 5:46 pm at 5:46 pm

    Heeheehee! That's a great one!

    • June 24, 2015 7:00 am at 7:00 am

      Thanks a bunch. 🙂

  24. June 23, 2015 8:54 pm at 8:54 pm

    Hilarious!!! I don't think he got it. 🙂 Thanks so much for the laugh, Sandee!

    • June 24, 2015 7:00 am at 7:00 am

      He may not of got it but it's funny. 🙂

  25. June 24, 2015 4:25 pm at 4:25 pm

    A real bargain!

    • June 24, 2015 4:31 pm at 4:31 pm

      I think the Rabbi just wanted to be fair. 🙂

  26. July 11, 2015 2:17 am at 2:17 am

    Ha Ha That is hilarious Sandee. I think I may have a spare $5, is the special still on???

    • July 11, 2015 10:47 am at 10:47 am

      As long as the Rabbi is covering for the Priest the special is still on. 🙂

Leave a Reply to Comedy Plus Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: