Frank Feldman

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.”

Passenger: “Who?”

Cabbie: “Frank Feldman… he’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.”

Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”

Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star. And you should have heard him play the piano! He was an amazing guy.”

Passenger: “Sounds like he was somebody really special.”

Cabbie: “Oh heck, there’s more! He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat it with. And he could fix anything—. Not like me – I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow, some guy then.”

Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made mistakes, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never argue back, even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished, too. He was the perfect man! I never knew him to make a mistake! No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.”

Passenger: “An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”

Cabbie: “Well… I never actually met Frank. He died, and I married his dang wife.”

Hat tip: Sandra on Facebook
Image Credit: Image Chef

  46 comments for “Frank Feldman

  1. Ann
    June 9, 2015 at 1:59 am

    LOL, poor guy.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:01 pm

      Yep, he'll never measure up will he. πŸ™‚

  2. June 9, 2015 at 3:44 am

    Poor guy, he will never meet the reputation.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:01 pm

      Never, apparently she's had the very best. πŸ™‚

  3. June 9, 2015 at 4:01 am

    Lol! This poor taxi driver, what a lousy time for him when he is with his wife!

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:01 pm

      Yep, not very fair to him at all. πŸ™‚

  4. June 9, 2015 at 4:37 am

    I'm always amazed at how clever joke writers are and this is one of those times.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:01 pm

      This one is very clever indeed. πŸ™‚

  5. June 9, 2015 at 5:44 am

    Frank sounds just like me ( the opposite ) but my wife knows already & she's satisfied with me.
    Have a brilliant Tuesday Sandee. See ya.

    Cruisin Paul

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:02 pm

      I'm guessing after all these years she's very satisfied with you. Good for the both of you. πŸ™‚

  6. June 9, 2015 at 5:44 am

    well, my husband never hears anything about my ex being great like Frank! lol. Have a great day!

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      Neither does mine. My ex was a nightmare and I'm being kind. πŸ™‚

  7. June 9, 2015 at 6:05 am

    Too funny. Poor Frank. Sandee, you have a super duper day along with Zane and Little Bit.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      Yes, poor Frank. πŸ™‚

  8. June 9, 2015 at 7:02 am

    bahahahahaha! :))

    OK, that right there was a really good one! big hugs xoxo

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      I thought so too Barb. πŸ™‚

  9. June 9, 2015 at 7:03 am

    That explains it.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      It sure does doesn't it. πŸ™‚

  10. June 9, 2015 at 9:07 am

    Dear Sandee, Adorable, poor cabby though, never be able to fill Franks shoes…
    xoxo Catherine

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      He'll never be able to fill anything of Frank's. πŸ™‚

  11. June 9, 2015 at 9:47 am

    LMAO I didn't expect that ending haha!

    Have a perfecttastic day Sandee :-h

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      I didn't either and these are my favorite kinds of jokes. πŸ™‚

  12. June 9, 2015 at 10:14 am

    Frank died to get away from his wife.

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      You may be right here. Yes you just might be right. πŸ™‚

  13. June 9, 2015 at 10:38 am

    HA!

  14. June 9, 2015 at 10:44 am

    LOL!!!! πŸ™‚

  15. June 9, 2015 at 11:07 am

    Heeheehee!

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:05 pm

      I thought so too. πŸ™‚

  16. LAC
    June 9, 2015 at 11:15 am

    Oh my! I imagine my next husband would be very much like the guy in the cab. No one could measure up to our guys, right?!

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:05 pm

      We both have the best husbands so we wouldn't be able to replace them. πŸ™‚

  17. June 9, 2015 at 12:57 pm

    I so didn't see that one coming! Good one. And life goes on.

    Big hugs, honey…

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:06 pm

      Me either and those are the very best jokes. πŸ™‚

  18. June 9, 2015 at 2:36 pm

    Lol! Poor cabbie. I didn't see it coming, either. Must be a slow day. Lol!

    • June 9, 2015 at 3:06 pm

      No, you're smart. It was just that good of a joke. πŸ™‚

  19. June 9, 2015 at 4:51 pm

    Laughing…Poor guy. It got me too.

    I hope you're having a great day Sandee.

    xoxoxo

    • June 9, 2015 at 4:57 pm

      I'm having a great day and I hope you are too. Big hugs. πŸ™‚

  20. June 9, 2015 at 6:20 pm

    Hahaha! This is so funny πŸ™‚

    • June 10, 2015 at 6:46 am

      I thought so too Jen. πŸ™‚

  21. June 10, 2015 at 10:51 am

    that poor guy….it's funny too!

    • June 10, 2015 at 11:46 am

      Yep, nobody is ever going to top her dead husband. πŸ™‚

  22. June 10, 2015 at 3:51 pm

    It's hard to be compared to perfection.

    • June 10, 2015 at 4:21 pm

      Yes, it is hard to be compared to perfection. πŸ™‚

  23. June 10, 2015 at 7:32 pm

    Comparison hurts πŸ™ and to the dead one..it must be hard!

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:08 am

      Comparisons aren't fair either. Not one bit. πŸ™‚

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