Life

On the first day, God created the dog and said, “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.”

The dog said, “That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I’ll give you back the other ten?”

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, “Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I’ll give you a twenty-year life span.”

The monkey said, “Monkey tricks for twenty years? That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?”

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, “You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.”

The cow said, “That’s kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I’ll give back the other forty?”

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, “Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I’ll give you twenty years.”

But the human said, “Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?”

“Okay,” said God, “You asked for it.”

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

Hat tip: Linda W.
Image Credit: Image Chef

Awww Mondays

Join us every Monday for Awww…Mondays. Post a picture that makes you say Awww…and that’s it.

Make sure you leave a link to your post here and I’ll visit your Awww…Mondays post. What better why to start the week than with a smile.

Add your link to the Linky Tools v2.0 and then follow the get the code link so we’ll have have the same links.

sleeping kitty.jpgImage Credit: Click on Image

Awww…Mondays Participants

1. Awww Mondays
2. Margs Animals
3. messymimi
4. Kathe W.
5. Woodsterman
6. Jody
7. Willy & Fluffy
8. Mike Golch
9. Linda
10. BeadedTail
11. ZoePhee
12. Traveling Bells
13. Flea
14. cube
15. OhMyShihTzu
16. Golden Doodles
17. Zen Cats
18. Terri Gardner
19. Samantha
20. Anne

Learn more about Awww…Mondays here.

Get The Code

Powered by… Mister Linky’s Magical Widgets.

Silly Sunday

Sunday is the place to come for weekly laughs. The rules are simple, just have fun.

This is a great opportunity to get to know other bloggers and have a laugh or two in the process. Here is how it works: Laugh and Link Up!

Out of the Mouth of Babes:
Image Credits: Click on Image

Silly Sunday Participants

1. Silly Sunday
2. BFDude
3. bethere2day
4. messymimi
5. cranky old man
6. Mike Golch
7. Woodsterman
8. Cruisin’ Paul
9. Blogitudes
10. Agent 54
11. Linda
12. Perk at Work
13. Cube
14. Rhonda
15. cube
16. Ann
17. Margs Animals
18. Traveling Bells
19. Cody
20. Jean R.
21. Kismet
22. Kathe W.
23. Ron Russell
24. Barb
25. Binky
26. Rocks

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.
Get The Code

Powered by… Mister Linky’s Magical Widgets.

Senior Computer Skills

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first email.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: ‘No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.’
Tech support: ‘Okay Bob, let’s press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter ‘P’ to bring up the Program Manager.’
Customer: I don’t have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: ‘P’…..on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I’M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!

Hat tip: Linda W.
Image Credit: Sales Stores